As a patient with a life limiting disease (primary myelofibrosis) I am all about maintaining a positive outlook. This positivity does not mean that everything is great all the time. It means that in spite of the difficulties we find joy. It even means that our difficulties push us to do more with our lives than we would have otherwise. We savor life more. We are more encouraging. We are more deliberate.
Denial may sometimes masquerade as a positive outlook, but it is not. In fact, it is dangerous. Denial is a natural part of the grief process and grief is a reasonable part of receiving a life changing diagnosis. Genuine positivity vaults us over our difficulties to a higher perspective where we find greater meaning and purpose that grows out of our problems. Denial says, "Problem? What problem?"
Denial dresses up in many different costumes. One person may simply refuse to acknowledge their disease at all. They do not want to learn about it. They do not want to talk about it. It is the proverbial elephant in the room, but they ignore it completely. Meanwhile it hurts their relationships. Many times I've heard from husbands, wives or children who feel shut out by their beloved patient who refuses to deal with the reality of his or her disease.
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